Long Distance Relationships: What Are The Keys To Success
It is believed that long distance relationships cannot prosper due to lack of physical contact. However, these couples are usually successful if they know how to live in the stage of infatuation.
Modern life and technology allow us many things, including having long distance relationships. These, like any other, have a series of advantages and disadvantages (which will be more or less accentuated as the case may be). However, in general, a great emphasis is placed on the number of kilometers that separate one from the other.
Sure, physical distance is a drawback, but that’s not all about the relationship. By this we do not mean that it is not difficult to cope, but that there is much more to consider than the physical distance at the end of the day.
In addition, it must be borne in mind that the idea of many couples who are at a distance is to get together at some point. While that happens, what is tried is to find a balance, applying some keys, such as the ones that we are going to comment on below.
Long-distance relationships have closer ties
They may have met on the Internet and each lived on the opposite end of the planet. Perhaps for work reasons one of the two moved to a very distant city and the other had to stay. Or they may even be a few kilometers apart, but due to their obligations they do not see each other on a daily basis. For cases, the colors!
Long-distance relationships are not something new, although it is true that it seems that they are becoming more and more frequent due to the way in which society advances. However, unlike what happened at the time, today couples have a series of facilities to communicate, thanks to the internet, social networks and different instant messaging services.
In the past, couples who were in a long-distance relationship generally did so because one of them had had to go to war or provide service far from their place of origin. Letters were written and they waited weeks or even months for a reply.
In the past, reaching a destination was also much more complicated than today, due to the type of connections, among other issues. Today, it is not that complicated (even if there are exceptions).
Success in long distance relationships
Although it may seem strange, long distance relationships can be more successful than conventional ones. Why? Because the bond that these two people create is usually closer. The simple fact of not seeing each other all the time leads them to try harder each time they are together, either in person or through a screen.
Couples who live far away have a greater degree of intimacy, make the most of the time available and overcome all kinds of barriers: languages, kilometers, means of communication …
Long-distance relationships allow us to prolong the so-called “infatuation stage” in which we idealize the other and continually think of that person. In conventional relationships, this situation ends routine and coexistence.
Missing yourself can also be positive, because the meeting is planned in detail and with great anxiety. The time you can spend together will be of higher quality, because you will not “use” it to fight or argue.
“If we see each other every weekend, let’s not waste time arguing” would be the recurring thought. The same goes for sex, headaches or excuses are put aside.
Keys for long-distance relationships to work
The first question that arises when we decide to have a long distance relationship is: is that physical separation worth it? Or, can we be successful?
If you have started a romance with these characteristics or are about to do so, keep these keys in mind.
1. Assess the situation
As a first step, you must do a job of introspection and be very aware of the decision you will make. Long distance relationships are not always like in the movies. Evaluate whether you will be able to endure so many days, weeks, or even months of separation or not seeing you with your partner.
Take into account some questions such as, for example, how many times will they be able to be seen and under what conditions (who will have to travel, at what time of year, how much money is needed). Likewise, you should ask yourself if you want a lasting relationship, what will happen in the future when they decide to live together or settle down, etc.
2. Set standards
Once you have accepted the long-distance relationship, something really important is to agree on some rules. Make everything clear. For example, at what times can they be called. Perhaps when for one it is day for the other it is night and it is difficult to get along taking into account the obligations and tasks.
Another very important issue is to establish and plan the meetings: at Christmas, for vacations, for a holiday, on weekends, etc.
Organizing the calendar in advance will allow you on the one hand to look forward to the moment and, on the other, to do your best to make it happen (for example, saving money for plane tickets).
3. Keep in touch
Today, with technology we have no excuses. All you need is an internet connection and an electronic device. It is really important to establish communication on a regular basis.
Long distance relationships without fluid communication do not thrive because human beings need some contact, at least through a screen.
Even if it is five minutes a day, telling the other about the experiences of the day and what happens to us allows us to strengthen the bond and maintain complicity or harmony. Talk about mundane things, any situation that has happened … But also include conversations about dreams, plans, future and goals.
They can vary the means of communication so that everything is not so monotonous : video call, telephone, messages, audios, emails or even old-fashioned letters.
4. Accept the changes that may arise
In relationships in general, there are issues that are beyond our means. Imagine what happens then when we are with someone who is several miles away!
It is very important to adapt to changes : that the Internet does not work, that one falls asleep due to the time difference, that they have to study, that they modify the working hours, etc.
Nothing and no one guarantees that a couple has a future. In the case of long-distance relationships, it may require more effort not to be close. However, if you both love each other and have the same goals, the distance is just one more obstacle that you must overcome together.
